An international fleet of naval warships encounters an alien armada while on a Naval war games exercise and faces the biggest threat mankind has ever faced. An intense battle is fought on sea, land and air. If they lose, the world could face a major extinction event and an alien invasion. Will humans win this alien war, what are the aliens doing here, and what do they want?
Was just starting my morning rounds aboard the USS Missouri — wiping down plaques, fixing coffee no one drinks, maybe grumbling about my knees — when these young hotshot sailors come barreling in yelling about aliens and needing firepower.
I figured they were filming another Transformers flick. Turns out, nope — we were actually about to go full red-alert on a bunch of water-hopping space crabs.
Next thing I know, I’m flanking a 16-inch naval gun with a kid who barely knows how to salute, shouting firing coordinates like it’s 1945 again. And let me tell you — it felt good. Like riding a bike. A bike that launches tungsten shells the size of Buicks.
Plot? Don't know. Didn’t care. I was too busy reclaiming my arthritis-ridden glory while AC/DC played in the background. We dropped those alien ships like bad habits.
Would I do it again? In a heartbeat.
Would I trust these wippersnappers to run a mop, let alone a destroyer? Hell no.
But give ‘em credit — they let us old dogs have one more good fight.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ — best retirement party ever.
The movie starts at 1:40:20--and it is absolute cinema.
Crank up your surround sound, turn off your brain, and revel in the beauty of a 58,000t battleship drop port anchor and drift like my boy Takumi.
The CGI holds up surprisingly. However, this is a dumb movie. There's just way too many "wait, how did they get from there to there in an instant?" moments to make it even fantastically immersive. And Rhiana's character is on scopes, guns, deck clearing, mini gun wielding, then back to gun controls. Like, what?
We'd genuinely be lucky to get a film like this today.
I unironically really like this film. Is it a good film? No. Is the story interesting? No. Are the characters good? No. Does it make any logical sense whatsoever? No. Does Taylor Kitsch drift a near 50,000 ton battle ship? Yes! Wait what?
On paper this film is pretty awful but it manages to capture something for me that I really appreciate. It's fun. You've got an alien invasion, force fields, mech suits, naval destroyers and battleships. It just oozes cool.
This is one of those movies that requires you to completely disengage your brain for the entire runtime, but I promise, if you do that, you'll have a good time.
Some genuine highlights of this film have got to be the special effects and, one again, the cool factor. It's hard to not enjoy the recommissioning of a WW2 Battleship to fight aliens whilst AC/DC is blasting.
The script and acting can only be described as suitable to the type of film it is. The special effects have a LOT of Transformers (2007) DNA in it, so it generally looks really good. The soundtrack is pretty awesome too.
On the AV front, it generally looks great and sounds perfectly fine, only being salvaged by the abundance of AC/DC. I'm genuinely amazed that this film has a 4K bluray, but truthfully it doesn't really add much. The sunrise looks a bit prettier I guess.
In conclusion, completely turn off your brain, grab a beer and you'll have a good time with this one.
The dumbest movie you'll probably love.
This movie absolutely shouldn't work: it's based on a board game fercrissakes; the physics are beyond implausible the plot holes myriad, and there's more handwavium in terms of the nature of the alien invasion than you can shake a stick at...
...And yet it's so winning in its emotional beats as well as optimism about America (and humans in general) that you can't help but be carried away with it. The cast is charismatic as heck, and the final scene which turns to docents as heroes is so over-the-top 'Murica! that you practically want to pump your fist in the air.
Whatever, it's fine. Like, wtf were you expecting?
Still better than the Boggle movie 🤣😂
It's a fun popcorn action movie! Don't expect much more and you will be entertained!
I really enjoy this movie. It is fun and pretty simple. It's fun if you want to watch some action, hijinks, and not take it too seriously.
⭐⭐½ – Battleship – Loud, dumb, and fully committed to the bit.
This is totally dumb — but dumb in a way that knows exactly what it’s doing. The action is loud, ridiculous, and energetic enough to keep you entertained even though the story and characters barely register once the credits roll. It’s prime mindless movie-night material.
If you think Rihanna makes a convincing battleship captain… well, that’s on you. But it’s also not a reason to instantly write the film off like so many did. Yes, it’s barely like the board game we all know — except for about five to ten minutes where they very literally recreate it — but honestly, how on earth were they supposed to make a faithful adaptation of that? Given the source material, they didn’t do terribly.
The unintentionally funniest part is the retired sailors sequence. They’re suddenly everywhere, already stationed on the ship, hands on the big guns, ready to roll like they never left. Don’t get me wrong — plenty of old timers I know would absolutely volunteer tomorrow — but the idea that an old battleship, half-crewed by people older than my father, would meaningfully hold its own against an interstellar enemy is… optimistic, at best.
Still, that’s missing the point. This isn’t Tennyson or Shakespeare. It’s not even pretending to be clever. It’s about big guns, big noise, and spectacle turned up high enough that you stop caring about the logic. Meet it on its level, and it does exactly what it says on the tin.
🚢🍺 An ice-cold lager cracked open mid-explosion — loud, silly, and surprisingly enjoyable if you stop asking questions.
🛥I so enjoyed this film. For anyone who likes a good action movie with excellent special effects and a few aliens with very cool ( and aggressive) ships then I’d definitely recommend this. It starts off a little slow but stick with it because the characters build and the story moves along quickly once the aliens arrive. It’s not overly graphic, not much bad language and it was a very enjoyable watch. I’d definitely watch it again.
Totally dumb, but in a good way. The action is loud and fun, making it entertaining even though the story and characters are pretty forgettable. Great for a mindless movie night.
One of the best bad movies. Never fails to put a smile on my face.
Excellent movie! Way better than it had any right to be, considering it's based on a board game! Neeson, Decker and Kitsch were all excellent ... worth the watch.
If you ever need an early 2000's recipe for a fun brain dead action movie, this will do it. Old men showing up out of nowhere when no one knows how to pilot a WW2 ship was my personal favorite part of this movie. It's a good time!
Reviews
Battleship
Jeremey reviewed
Battleship
April 29, 2025Was just starting my morning rounds aboard the USS Missouri — wiping down plaques, fixing coffee no one drinks, maybe grumbling about my knees — when these young hotshot sailors come barreling in yelling about aliens and needing firepower.
I figured they were filming another Transformers flick. Turns out, nope — we were actually about to go full red-alert on a bunch of water-hopping space crabs.
Next thing I know, I’m flanking a 16-inch naval gun with a kid who barely knows how to salute, shouting firing coordinates like it’s 1945 again. And let me tell you — it felt good. Like riding a bike. A bike that launches tungsten shells the size of Buicks.
Plot? Don't know. Didn’t care. I was too busy reclaiming my arthritis-ridden glory while AC/DC played in the background. We dropped those alien ships like bad habits.
Would I do it again? In a heartbeat.
Would I trust these wippersnappers to run a mop, let alone a destroyer? Hell no.
But give ‘em credit — they let us old dogs have one more good fight.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ — best retirement party ever.
1
26
munk888 reviewed
Battleship
August 1, 2026The CGI holds up surprisingly. However, this is a dumb movie. There's just way too many "wait, how did they get from there to there in an instant?" moments to make it even fantastically immersive. And Rhiana's character is on scopes, guns, deck clearing, mini gun wielding, then back to gun controls. Like, what?
M08Y reviewed
Battleship
June 30, 2026We'd genuinely be lucky to get a film like this today.
I unironically really like this film. Is it a good film? No. Is the story interesting? No. Are the characters good? No. Does it make any logical sense whatsoever? No. Does Taylor Kitsch drift a near 50,000 ton battle ship? Yes! Wait what?
On paper this film is pretty awful but it manages to capture something for me that I really appreciate. It's fun. You've got an alien invasion, force fields, mech suits, naval destroyers and battleships. It just oozes cool.
This is one of those movies that requires you to completely disengage your brain for the entire runtime, but I promise, if you do that, you'll have a good time.
Some genuine highlights of this film have got to be the special effects and, one again, the cool factor. It's hard to not enjoy the recommissioning of a WW2 Battleship to fight aliens whilst AC/DC is blasting.
The script and acting can only be described as suitable to the type of film it is. The special effects have a LOT of Transformers (2007) DNA in it, so it generally looks really good. The soundtrack is pretty awesome too.
On the AV front, it generally looks great and sounds perfectly fine, only being salvaged by the abundance of AC/DC. I'm genuinely amazed that this film has a 4K bluray, but truthfully it doesn't really add much. The sunrise looks a bit prettier I guess.
In conclusion, completely turn off your brain, grab a beer and you'll have a good time with this one.
Peter Bickford reviewed
Battleship
May 24, 2026The dumbest movie you'll probably love.
This movie absolutely shouldn't work: it's based on a board game fercrissakes; the physics are beyond implausible the plot holes myriad, and there's more handwavium in terms of the nature of the alien invasion than you can shake a stick at...
...And yet it's so winning in its emotional beats as well as optimism about America (and humans in general) that you can't help but be carried away with it. The cast is charismatic as heck, and the final scene which turns to docents as heroes is so over-the-top 'Murica! that you practically want to pump your fist in the air.
Callum reviewed
Battleship
December 28, 2025⭐⭐½ – Battleship – Loud, dumb, and fully committed to the bit.
This is totally dumb — but dumb in a way that knows exactly what it’s doing. The action is loud, ridiculous, and energetic enough to keep you entertained even though the story and characters barely register once the credits roll. It’s prime mindless movie-night material.
If you think Rihanna makes a convincing battleship captain… well, that’s on you. But it’s also not a reason to instantly write the film off like so many did. Yes, it’s barely like the board game we all know — except for about five to ten minutes where they very literally recreate it — but honestly, how on earth were they supposed to make a faithful adaptation of that? Given the source material, they didn’t do terribly.
The unintentionally funniest part is the retired sailors sequence. They’re suddenly everywhere, already stationed on the ship, hands on the big guns, ready to roll like they never left. Don’t get me wrong — plenty of old timers I know would absolutely volunteer tomorrow — but the idea that an old battleship, half-crewed by people older than my father, would meaningfully hold its own against an interstellar enemy is… optimistic, at best.
Still, that’s missing the point. This isn’t Tennyson or Shakespeare. It’s not even pretending to be clever. It’s about big guns, big noise, and spectacle turned up high enough that you stop caring about the logic. Meet it on its level, and it does exactly what it says on the tin.
🚢🍺 An ice-cold lager cracked open mid-explosion — loud, silly, and surprisingly enjoyable if you stop asking questions.
ርልዪረ reviewed
Battleship
February 7, 2025🛥I so enjoyed this film. For anyone who likes a good action movie with excellent special effects and a few aliens with very cool ( and aggressive) ships then I’d definitely recommend this. It starts off a little slow but stick with it because the characters build and the story moves along quickly once the aliens arrive. It’s not overly graphic, not much bad language and it was a very enjoyable watch. I’d definitely watch it again.
